Old Gift, New Pleasure

One thing missing at our house this Christmas was reading material; always, both in my family home growing up and my present home, books and magazines were a huge part of gift giving at Christmas… so many Christmas reading “times” and memories…. cool down reading following the excitement of gift opening, after turkey/pre relative visits on Christmas Day, day after boxing day munch and read in bed, reading by the fire at the cabin waiting for New Years Eve celebrations to unfold, listening to Dad share from his books, usually local lore or history, Christopher sitting on my lap going through the Guinness World Record books he loved to get every year, marveling with every turn of the page, all of us making fun of Mom’s harlequin romance type reading (wait now, come to think of it, Dad never made fun of her romance reading, hmmmmmm). There were always books for Christmas gifts, everybody wanted books of some sort and when a loved one picked them out for you, it meant even more anticipation to read it. This year, only one lone magazine existed under our tree, so after gift opening and xmas day brunch were over, in that “time before we head to moms for turkey dinner” time when I would usually at least browse my new reading material to pick what I would read first over the holidays,  I found a void – thought about turning on the TV or browsing the internet for something to read, then thought… NO … not going there on Christmas Day… I ascended up the stairs to our study and picked out some old favorite reads …. I actually went looking for Borrowed Black, a children’s book I enjoyed immensely with Christopher but failed to find it. I settled for several other children’s books that brought back memories of cuddling with Christopher, enjoying his curiosity, creativity and intrigue with stories at such a young age. I also took four or five old favorite novels I was hoping to keep me occupied until next year (before my literary brother, Georgie gets a chance to say “you only read 4 or 5 books a year?!” remember it was xmas day so “next year” is only a week away). I also came upon a gem one of my favourite people in the world gave me many many years ago… a self-help motivational type book, not a genre that fills our bookshelves or has a “section” in our family’s study; although they do occupy parts of Christopher’s room and bookshelves. The book is called “Eat Mangoes Naked, Finding Pleasure Everywhere and Dancing With the Pits!” by Sark, her book “Succulent Wild Women” was right next to it but these days “Dancing with the pits” resonates with me a whole lot more than succulence. Although I’ve felt like a wild woman a lot in recent years, I don’t think it’s in the same way Sark was referencing in her title! 

Anyway, I’m really glad I found the book and it was a fun little Christmas read. Almost 20 years later and a whole lot of life experience since, it was a different read the second time around for sure. I’m pretty sure when I originally read it, I didn’t need it like I need it now. Back then! 2001! The year I made Chris’ dream come true by moving back to Gander (really his dream was to live where Nan was, I don’t think Gander was the attraction at all), started a new program consultant job with government, got married to the love of my life on a beautiful beach in Lumdsen, bought my first (and still only) house and was planning to have two more children! 2001… I had the world by the balls! All set, life… GREAT!! I probably thought “Why is Lori  giving me this, I don’t need this, I could write this!”; but now, almost 20 years later in a much different headspace I appreciated this gift immensely and it certainly “self helped” me this time. It reminded me to find pleasure every day in the simple things, be mindful of the present, take notice of your surroundings and allow yourself to dream. You know all that “silver linings” crap people talk about. Sark’s books are fun and often have little activities to do, journaling as you read, she asks you to do different things or write down your thoughts to a prompt after she shares too. I want to share one of these activities, this one, captures what the book is all about.  Sark writes, “Sending out pleasures to the world. As we expand our ability to experience and remember pleasure, it is good to share the pleasure by sending it to other people. Begin now to invent pleasures to send. I send to you…

twin star lilies in a crystal vase

the site of a baby hippo, just born

Pygmy music from North Africa

brand new underwear (I want to tell Sark my husband can relate to this one … he just graduated from boring ole briefs to saxx and 2under type underwear, moisture wicking fabric with “ball parks” and “jersey pouches” seem to bring him pleasure)

one deluxe violin serenade

tiny seashells in a toddler‘s hand

jewel tone glass bottles

A private poetry recital, just for you

homemade biscuits with soft butter

the applause of your ancestors

The sending is powerful telepathically” she says.

So, then she has some bubbles for you to write your pleasures in; they were blank of course, as I never filled them in the first time I read the book, I really wish I had now; how fun would that be for self reflection 20 years later! Surprisingly, the boys agreed to do this one with me, after all it was Christmas! I’m going to share the pleasures Christopher, Jason and I came up with. Those who know us well can probably figure out who said what.

I send to you…

warm salty ocean spray on your face as you listen to the wind and the waves

A hug from a happy child

gold and purple evenings

music that makes you dance no matter how hard you try not to

family ….actually he said “Familia”

the thrill of falling from the air in slow motion and landing lightly in a grassy field

stumbling upon a smile

gut wrenching unstoppable laughter with a soulmate or two

bright starry nights

putting on socks straight out of the dryer

the crisp clean feel and smell of sheets that just came off the clothesline

 a crazy carpet and endless downhill sliding with no effort to get up between slides

slanted sideways puppy dog looks

If you are willing, I invite you to share some simple pleasures with me. I’m hoping a few of you will indulge me, private message me, comment here or post on my Facebook. Sark is right, it’s so important to find pleasure in little things (like self help books you got when you were 30 but didn’t need until you were 50, lol) and be mindful of the beauty that is always around you no matter what is going on in your life. Sunrise and sunset happen every day, has forever …. still a pleasure to watch every time!